Hope for Your Husband’s Porn Addiction: 3 Critical Reminders


The waves were rough that day.

I had my little daughter standing next to me in the calf-deep water. Grannie was sitting in front of me, closer to the shore. We chatted. We laughed. And we didn’t notice the wave behind us.

All of the sudden we were smacked with a large, unexpected wave that lifted Hannah off her feet and nearly knocked my 88-pound grandmother under the water. Hannah had already been holding my hand, but since her feet no longer found footing on the ocean floor, the rip tide was carrying her north. I tightened my grip on her and lunged for my grandmother to help her keep her head above water.

I had two people who did not have enough strength to battle the wave and undertow on their own, clinging to me. My arms were outstretched, one pulled north and one pulled south. My heels dug into the sand beneath me and I held on as tight as I could, desperate to save them both. The wave passed and everyone righted themselves, hearts beating quickly, relief settling in.

Fighting Porn. Losing Hope.

Later, as I reflected on that terrifying moment, I saw myself not as the one doing the saving, but as the one who needed to be saved. Jesus was in my place, arms stretched out, hands clasped upon me, never losing His grip, despite the pull of the waves.

But when it came to Craig’s porn addiction, we both found ourselves letting go of the one person who could actually save us – Jesus.

I kept myself afloat with my list of rules and regulations he needed follow to keep away from porn. I buoyed myself with anger toward the porn industry. He tried to keep his head above water with his own willpower, which never seemed to last longer than a month or two. We were barely treading water because we put all our hope into recovery, an end to the tenacious cycle of addiction.

Please head on over to the Covenant Eyes blog to read more about how you can have hope even in the midst of the storms of porn addiction. Just click here.

7 Ways to Support your Spouse through Porn Addiction

Support Spouse

{I’m over at On Faith Street today talking about some practical ways we can help our spouse through porn addiction. Here’s a teaser:

Imagine with me for a moment that you come home one night to find your husband engaging sexually with another woman. Shock and rage consume you, yet there is no one but him to hear your cries. He’s the only one in the room. This other woman? She’s on the computer screen, completely oblivious to your presence.

Pure Eyes, Clean HeartThis is the man you pledged your love, commitment, and fidelity to all those months and years ago, and now you feel like you’re competing with pornography for his love, attention, and affection. Where do you possibly go from here?

While part of you wants to help him rid his life of this nasty sin, another part of you is reeling with hurt, anger, and betrayal. I know because I’ve been there. I made many mistakes when I first discovered my husband was in the throes of a pornography addiction, but God extended us both the grace and wisdom that eventually helped us heal.

To continue reading, please click over here.

photo credit: Love via photopin (license) (Texted added by Jen)

Why I Want to Hug Russell Brand


{I’m so honored to be at ForEveryMom.com this week with this post. Enjoy the teaser and then head on over here to continue reading.}

I never thought I’d actually want to hug Russell Brand. He’s one of those people who gave me pause. All I could see was his eclectic energy and behaviors. I had no idea about the real man.

Now, I want to invite him to dinner. I think we may have more in common than I first thought.

In case you missed it, Russell told the world his thoughts on pornography. He’s still dressed rather eclectically (does a sheet like-thing count as dressed?). He speaks quickly with energetic hand gestures, his eyes brimming with excitement. The whole time I listened, my ears strained to catch every word because here was a Hollywood man saying porn was dangerous, not only to the women and men enslaved by the industry but to the very people who watch it.

He admits that porn has affected his ability to relate not only to women, but also to himself. It’s had negative repercussions on both his sexuality and his spirituality. He says if he could go back, he’d never look at porn that very first time.

My husband would say the same thing. {come over here to keep reading}